Tom Brady took to Facebook today to share his dance moves with the world. He might be regretting that. Brady clearly knows that his hot-steppin’ leaves something to be desired. But does he know just how bad he is?
He looks like he’s trying to open an imaginary bag of chips … on a mini-tramp … while simultaneously sporting a smile that should be reserved for 13-year-olds listening to Adam Sandler prank calls on cassette.
Sadly, Tom isn’t the first professional athlete to make a mockery of the art of dance. We’ve compiled a list of the five worst dancers in sports history. Spoiler alert: they’re all white! Further spoiler alert: Brady is #1!
5. Novak Djokovic:
Novak Djokovic is the best tennis player in the world. You’d think someone with so much to celebrate would put a little more time into not-celebrating-like-an-idiot.
Maybe this dance is a Serbian thing? Can dance be lost in translation? Nole doesn’t get the benefit of the doubt. This is awful.
The worst part, though, is that the announcer f***ing loves it! We can pencil in the announcer at #6 just based on his reaction.
4. Webb Simpson:
Golfer Webb Simpson appears to be at a wedding in this video. That makes his bad dancing all the more inexcusable: he’s probably drunk; drunk people are supposed to get better at dancing.
3. Matt Cassel:
Matt Cassel was still Tom Brady’s backup at the time of this video. We know who to blame.
What is Cassel doing with that bat? He looks like that one green army man that I always thought was surrendering but is actually supposed to be crawling.
2. Mark Madsen:
Mark Madsen was a basketball player who went to Stanford. Mark Madsen doesn’t dance like a basketball player. Mark Madsen does dance like he went to Stanford.
1. Tom Brady:
The moves I learned at the Edelman and Gronkowski School of Dance are really paying off!
Posted by Tom Brady on Tuesday, 16 June 2015
All of my senses have been offended by Tom Brady’s dancing. It even tastes bad.
(Photo credit: Christopher Johnson (globalite) (originally posted to Flickr as IMG_9112_2) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons. Photo has been cropped.)